Worst...Beer..Ever

[scootertig]

(the subject should be read in your best "Comic Book Guy" voice)

So, inspired by recent happenings, I'm was originally going to ask what each of you consider the worst (commercial) beer you've ever had. Then I decided that rather than trying to nominate superlatively bad beers, I'd make the question "What beer will you never buy again?"

For instance, on one of my crazy Total Wine "choose your own adventure" trips, I found Lancaster Brewing's Amish Four Grain Ale, and thought it was just bad. It wasn't spoiled, or infected, or stale. Just bad. Bad recipe. Bad experience.

Someone, somewhere must LOVE this beer, and probably hold it as the utmost pinnacle of all brewdom, but I was not impressed.

I wouldn't say it was the worst beer I've ever had, but I definitely won't buy it again.

And, before anyone else can say it (since I'm the only one that actually BOUGHT it), I'll add "Golden Showers" to the list.

Yikes.

Oh, and no fair adding any of the BMC beers. Those are clearly geared to a different market segment. Make the question "What craft beer will you never buy again" and we'll take "craft" to include brewpubs as well. Debate amongst yourselves if you want to include Sierra Nevada and/or Sam Adams as "craft" beers at this point...


aaron

PS - the board is lonely today! where is everyone!?

[scootertig]

OK, so it's totally gauche to be the first reply to my own topic, but I had to include this... On ratebeer.com (a cool site if you've never been there, the address is, uhhh, ratebeer.com), you have to see this review of the DFH Golden Shower. I might point out that if you read most of the other reviews, people are just all agog over what an "amazing" beer this is. This guy's review is wayyyy more in-line with my experience (and, I'll point out, I had to try it TWICE):

ClarkVV (2629), Framingham, Massachusetts, USA

2006 750mL bottle consumed on 4/13/06 with SuIIy

A filtered, rusty orange-marigold appearance, not even that bright, but rather dulled by moderate brassy tints. Large bubbles throughout the liquid, with a large, rocky white head that is slow to recede due to the ample forced carbonation. Some light lacing due to the heavy dextrin content, no doubt.

Aroma of thick, unfiltered orange-blossom honey, mushy, sugary graham crackers, old, leafy, dry noble hops and an odd vegetal, musty, sweaty note. Graham cracker, dough and honey all serve to heavily thicken the aroma, sweetening it immensely, beyond the point that these minimally bitter hops can balance. Old, stale, lightly herbal (oregano and dill) and sweaty notes come from the hops, while baked sour dough notes (yeast perhaps?) forces a sourish note through, clashing with the delicate hops. Hop levels seem about on par with a pale lager and I’m left sniffing the glass and wondering what is "Imperial" about this other than the strong, syrupy, sluggish malt.

The flavor is one of the most unbalanced, malt-heavy, sweet and syrupy concoctions I have drunk recently. Huge amounts of syrupy honey, strong dough and light alcohol warmth bombard the palate. The effect of the hops in this one seems on parallel with tossing ice cubes in to the Sun to try to cool it down. A lost effort. Dirty, soily, dull and ultimately, completely lost in this sticky, sluggish, completely crass mess of a flavor. Carbonation is not tight, but rather the bubbles are large and expansive, further killing off any chance of a bright, crisp pilsner-like beer. Rogue’s Impy Pils has plenty of hops, an unfiltered texture with tight carbonation and the correct attenuation. Sam Adams has beautifully wed hops and malt, strong, bitter and crisp while DdC’s sixieme soir is a study in attenuation and balance. I can’t find a single quality done right here. Horribly underattenuated, poor carbonation conditioning, weak, dull hops and too much alcohol. Couldn’t finish a 750mL bottle between two people.

My two favorite quotes: "The effect of the hops in this one seems on parallel with tossing ice cubes in to the Sun to try to cool it down. A lost effort." and "I can’t find a single quality done right here."

Check out others at: http://www.ratebeer.com/Beer/dogfish-head-golden-shower/23461/


aaron

[JMUBrew]

Haha, very nice write up by that guy! Was going to also say, I've been in and out during the day today! Just not much action today.

[Randy]

Unibroue's Éphémère (http://www.unibroue.com/products/ephemere-pomme.cfm), I love beer and I love apple juice, but putting them together just doesn't work for me. I accidentally picked up a belgian example of this type of beer from Norm's last weekend and I couldn't stand that either.

I bet there are people that love this, but it just isn't for me.

[G_Reichow]

my "worst craft beer" has 2 entries

1) went to brikskeller in DC, and tried a swedish or dutch brew called the 4 horsemen, wasn't beer smart enough at the time to tell you why I don't like it, nor do I remember, what lasts though is that I still shudder when I think of it.

2) endeavoring to get enough empty's to bottle my dads first batch of homebrew (continental light kit from brewers best), I swung past total beverage in sterling to get some "soon to be empties". Imagine my surprise when I found winterhook winter brew on sale for 2 bucks a 6 pack (after the coupon). First taste caused me to think of fall, the after taste left me thinking "why so much nutmeg" and from then on out, every sip tasted like an overly spiced pumpkin pie. Not just a little nutmeg, but I think they used a whole clove per bottle, I might has well boiled the beer off to get the raw nutmeg and saved some money! YUCK.

-Greer